A lot of people seem to seek advice from me when it comes to relationships - what to do, how to get guys to like you, what not to do... and I seem to do a pretty good job of giving said advice. I always tell people be true to yourself, make yourself happy first and foremost, and from that others around you will be happy too. And, if you do find yourself feeling odd and lonely after the breakup, keep in mind that there is a big difference between being alone, and being lonely. I've been told that I seem much wiser than my mere 22 years because of this.
What I find difficult is taking my own advice, even if its exactly the same situation or scenario. I can tell other people what they could do, but shy away from it in my own life; I put others happiness if front of my own, and think no, that'll hurt their feelings.. I won't bring anything up...
I find because of this, I feel guilty. If I'm out with other friends - not my significant other - and have a good time, on the way home I feel guilty that I enjoyed myself, that I was happy. Then I get to thinking that no, that's no right, I should be happy regardless of what I'm doing of whom I'm with.. but I'm too nice to do anything about it. I can feel completely miserable but I'll tough it out for their sake....but if it were a friend complaining about the same thing I'd tell them to just fuck it and do whats right for them, even it if meant ending the relationship. It's easy enough to say its not your guilt to have, they are not your responsibility, but doing it in first person sucks.
I know what I have to do, but I'm held back by the claws of guilt that I will hurt them.. when all I'm really doing is hurting myself as they sink in deeper and deeper. I'm not myself anymore. I don't like it.
